I’ve been a part of the Tuesday’s at Ten Facebook group for quite some time now, however this is the first time that I am following through and posting on a topic. I am hoping to make this a regular occurrence on my blog. Just to tell you a little about it, each week, a topic is given on Tuesday and the blogger then has 6 days to write or create something pertaining to the posted topic. The most recent topic is:
This is a topic that really hits home for me yet I have a REALLY hard time talking and writing about it. It is one of those things I really don’t like to admit is that I doubt myself, even though sometimes it is self evident.
I think everyone doubts themselves at times. But, sometimes mine can be excessive especially when my depression is revved into high gear. You know those little thoughts in your head that say, this isn’t good enough, you’ll never be good enough, why would someone read this and so on. Those little thoughts that only feed my self doubt and pull me deeper into depression. When that happens it seems like I just want to curl up and not share my thoughts, my insights, my feelings because I have doubts. Doubts that what you’re going to share won’t measure up. That it’s not good enough. But Why? Is it lack of confidence? Is it fear? For me it’s all of the above and then some.
Why do you doubt yourself?
I’m taking an online weekly class on courageworks.com that is put on by Brene’ Brown. It is covering the books Daring Greatly and Rising Strong. Thus far we have learned that we have to learn to put ourselves out into the arena of life. That even though we have fears and doubts that we have to live brave and be vulnerable, as that is the only way to put our true selves out into the world.
Honestly, before the first class, I had a panic attack thinking about the idea of putting myself out there and learning to be vulnerable. As Brene’ says if you are out in the arena, you will fall down, you will get hurt, but you will be able to rise strong. The getting hurt is the issue I have. I try and protect myself and by doubting myself, I may think of something that someone else may think and then I am prepared for the worst, so to say. But, what I am learning is, what if that worst doesn’t happen. I am spending all this energy and effort into trying to protect myself, when I should just be okay with being me and learn to deal with the “worst” as it comes, rather than “preparing” myself for it.
What makes you doubt yourself?
If you’re interested in what the rest of the group has written about the topic of doubt, check it out at Finding the Grace Within.
Thank you for joining me today and have a blessed Sunday!
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